I knew the SSNDs (School Sisters of Notre Dame) were not "the right" place.
This was a kind of sad moment because I'm a teacher and they teach!
I also decided contemplative and cloistered orders weren't for me. My strengths are my willingness to minister to those in need.
I LOVE the mission of the Daughters of St. Paul! While I was talking to them, I kept thinking of where my talents fit into their ministry. I realized they don't. I am also not a fan of the habit. It was a strange feeling I had while there. I will do what I can to support them, but that's not where God is calling me.
So there are 2 orders that I am having a strong pull in my heart with...The ASCs (Adorers of the Blood of Christ) and CSJs (Sisters of St. Joseph of Carondelet). I had excluded the ASCs mostly because "they were too close to home" but they may be "the one" I'm not 100% sure yet.
Then, when I took the Vision Vocation Match quiz, it came up with the CSJs. Everyone I have talked to about this quiz always mentions the 100s of choices that pop up. I only remember the top coupe...I don't even think that I realized there were so many...my top match? The CSJs! I knew that I needed to explore this community!
One of my favorite saints is St. Joseph. He is the patron saint of Wheat Teams and he is the worker. Often times people forget him because he was just a carpenter that married Mary and served as foster father to Jesus. His role was a supporting role and he did it without complaining! I want to be like St. Joseph! Now people bury his statue upside down in hopes of selling their house...
So, I contacted the CSJs. It took me about a month to figure out what to say in an email, but then just filled out a form that was on their website instead. (It's kind of awkward to put into words that you are wanting to discern with a community) They are right across "the river" in South St. Louis. I was invited to come visit and talk with some of the "newer" sisters. It was a weird feeling. I have been stalking them online for months and I finally got to meet them! I am going back tomorrow for a young adult event. I need the chance to get to know more of them better. I do love the work that they do!
I have also been in contact with the ASCs. I guess my "aversion" to them is simple. I know many of them and I want the chance to start new with people who haven't known me since high school and don't know my whole family. However, I kind of feel like I belong with them. I met with some of there vocation team on Monday and had lunch with them. They were awesome! It was a nice lunch and 2 hours flew by! I am discerning more seriously with the ASCs! A BIG thing that is pulling me in the direction of the ASCs is that they do more mission work around the world than the CSJs (from what I have read) I feel like God is calling me to minister to people around the world! (Fun fact, my phone just auto-corrected people to pope)
To sum up this somewhat rambling blog, I think I have narrowed my search to these two orders! That's a pretty big accomplishment! The next few months will be focused on getting to know sisters from both these communities and listening to what God is telling me.
Please continue to pray for me!
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