#TheSisterhoodFinale

Tonight was the season finale of "The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns"

This show has helped with my own discernment! It was like I was on the journey with the ladies exploring those communities! (I wish they had shown more of the Sisters of St. Joseph the Worker)

My (maybe) final thoughts of the show:

-Christie and Claire came into the experience prepared and it showed! I'm really excited for them that they have found to what community God is calling them!

-Stacy is brave in her own way! She has decided that God isn't calling her to religious life and it's awesome that she has realized this!

-Eseni and Francesca weren't prepared and hadn't been seriously discerning before this experience. And I REALLY didn't like the stupid things they were doing at the end. It showed immaturity on their part.

-It was AWESOME the way they did the final episode. They showed that they didn't run away and join the convent right away, but there were more steps for Christie and Claire to make! I also liked that they showed how the others had discerned that they weren't actively pursuing religious life at the moment.

-I LOOOVED Francesca's mom! My mom had told me something similar (about being brainwashed) when I went to a Theology on Tap hosted by the PHJCs. She was also one of the hardest people to tell when I told her that it was there that I had the overwhelming feeling that God was calling me to discern.

One of my biggest fears of starting discernment was what people would think if I chose NOT to pursue religious life. It was scary for me to tell people because I didn't want people thinking I was a bad person if I didn't chose religious life after starting the process. 

Overall Rating:

I would give this 4 out of 5 stars. I think some of the women needed to discern more. Also, the immaturity was off-putting at times. I do hope for a season 2! Would love to have sisters who don't wear the habit spotlighted!

This Week's Thoughts on "The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns"

Wow! This week's "The Sisterhood: Becoming Nums" really struck a chord with me. I have many thoughts about it...I shall arrange in a list to keep them orderly.

1. I LOVE that Eseni admitted that she didn't care for adoration. That it made her feel uncomfortable. It was neat that they showed adoration on T.V. and showed the different ways people adore Jesus.

2. I still feel like Eseni isn't truely discerning and that she is bringing Francesca down with her. The stunt that they pulled with their skirts at the end after a very powerful modesty discussion was immature. I think EVERYONE rolled their skirts in grade school, but you aren't in grade school anymore! I also think that Darnell doesn't love her. If he did, he would understand her need to discern*

*I know this from experience. While it may not have been a romantic love, it was my family. The way that they are supporting me, even when they don't understand, is truely amazing.

3. GAH!!! That's the (at least) THIRD time this week that I have felt the need for confession! As they were doing adoration, I thought to myself, I wish they would show confession...they did...and I do plan on going to confession on Thursday.

4. I can really relate to how Christie is feeling about that pull that she has found "the right" community. That is where I an at right now...I THINK I found "THE" community!! I'm still in discernment, but that pull in my heart is truely amazing!!

5. I'm back on Twitter...just so I can follow the #realpostulants...ya, exciting life...

6. One of the very first things I learned to do when I started my discernment was to let God love me. Wow, did I get chills when Sister talked about that...I still do it every night. 

Here's what I do:

-lay down and be comfortable

-close my eyes

-imagine God as the most perfect person

-see and feel His arms around me

-feel the love that He has for me

Often times I fall asleep doing this, it's okay because I'm falling asleep in the living embrace of God!

These are just my thoughts as I watch the show! I LOVE it and feel like I'm exploring these communities with Eseni, Claire, Stacy, Francesca, and Christie!

New (Liturgical) Year Resolutions!!!

The current pastor at my home parish is an interesting man. He tried to be funny me his homily last week by starting it out with "Happy New Year!" 

It didn't work and I'm fairly certain only a couple of us understood it.

It got me thinking. We set goals for a new calendar year, why not set goals for the new liturgical year.

Then this week at mass I had an overwhelming feeling that I need to go to reconciliation.

So that got now got me thinking of what I want to work on in this liturgical year.

1. Go to reconciliation once a month.

This will also require me to "get over" my anxiety I have with this sacrament, so please pray for me with this one.

2. Don't miss any holy day and Sunday masses.

I have been super lazy about attending mass. I can say that I have only missed 1 Sunday mass since July.

3. Attend a weekday mass at least once a week.

This is pure laziness on my part. I'm not a fan of mornings. And I can't find an evening weekday mass.

I feel like this is enough for right now. I will update as the year goes on with how I am doing. Again, please pray for me with going to reconciliation. My chest gets right just thinking about going.

Adoration...What Am I Missing?

I have a confession to make...I don't care for adoration.

What??? How can I be a Catholic, discerning religious life and not like adoration???

I think it's a lack of knowledge and not growing up with it. Maybe it's how it's done when I go.

Tonight, for example, I went to a "Surrender Adoration"...not a fan...not enough quiet time to talk to God. Surrender is a more contemporary adoration when praise music is being played and people are encouraged to sing along. I know this works for some people, but I found it hard to concentrate on my conversation with God with people singing, loudly right behind me.

I have also done a more traditional benediction while on TEC. It feels forced and awkward. We sit in a circle and take turns talking to God. 

So, I have a favor to ask. What draws you to adoration? What do you do when at adoration? What advice do you have for someone wanting to like adoration, but is having a hard time enjoying it?

Timehops

Who doesn't love a good Timehop?

Sometimes they are super boring

Such an interesting life I lead, I know!

Sometimes you wondered why you shared such a stupid thing...like how sick, bored, and the like with something.

I check my Timehop daily. I always find it them interesting and share the good ones.

Ya, totally shared this one...I thought it was funny enough to share a 2nd time, 5 years later....

Today, I read my Timehops, and I had a moment...

The Timehop:

The moment:

Who is always there for me when I'm going to fall? 

God. 

Who will always love me, no matter what? 

God. 

Who wants the best for me even when I don't realize what that is? 

God! 

Every time I fall, stumble, and fail, God will be there with His arms open. He will welcome me with a big hug and forgive me for my mistakes.

While what I meant 5 years ago was a boyfriend, what it means today is so much more.

**Please excuse the "Twilight" refrence.

The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns

As I was laying on the couch, dying from the flu on Sunday, I had a moment of awareness and I noticed a commercial for a new series...something that I had been looking for on YouTube...a show showing what it takes to become a sister!!!

I was BEYOND excited!!! I quickly found it and set it to record!

Tonight, "The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns" premiered...

I'm slightly disappointed. First, I was hoping for young women further in their discernment journey. I feel like I'm further in my discernment than some of the women.

It takes some discernment to embark in such an adventure, but I don't think I could have done it when I was in the phase these ladies are in. Heck, it took me a month after I had my "ah-ha moment" to tell my parents and neatly 3 months before I felt comfortable enough to tell other family and friends. Now, about 5 months into the process, I'm willingly telling people I just meet that I'm discerning religious life.

What I was expecting was different. I thought the show was going to be about young woman who had discerned that they were called to religious life and that they were starting on that journey into the community they were called to.

I guess when I saw this as their promo picture, I should have known better...

Now, I don't Twitter, but a friend of mine sent me a link to the #RealPostulants and #RealNun and I have checked out what they had to say. Go check it out if you "Twitter".

Ya, this tweet is true...bah humbug!

The show had it's good moments. First, feelings I have been having were put into words. That feeling that God is "the one" for me and he has personally "proposed" to me. It's a strange concept, but that's THE feeling I have had! God's the one I want!

Second, I believe it was Francesca's mom who said something along the lines of not wanting her to go away...my mom has been saying this to me since I started looking seriously at communities.

I also enjoyed what the priest had to say about discernment. If you aren't doing the right thing, you will be like a bird with a broken wing. (At least, that is what I comprehended)

I relate to Claire. I think she's truely in a place where long visits to communities and serious discernment is right for her. I have a feeling she is going to become the "bad guy" because she is in a serious discernment.

So, I will be watching this reality show. I think the fact that I discovered it while sick, was a sign that it will be part of my discernment journey.

"Friends Forever"

The Ferguson, MO protests are happening REALLY close to where I live. There have even been (false) reports of riots by the school I work at. However, I am not going to blog about that today. I want to blog happy thoughts tonight!

AAAAAAANNNNNDDDD happy thoughts = YouTube....

No, really, you should totally try it!! I end up in the strangest places, but it's fun!

Tonight was a journey through Jr. High and High School. It started with this video:

I was going to blog about my terrible senior year, but then I remember..."THE PAST IS IN THE PAST!!!" And I should just "let it go"

I found this video tonight:

Wow!! So true!! It was a naive thougt that people I was friends with for 18ish years would just start ignoring me. We were Facebook friends until I had enough and deleted them.

But I have better friends! My college friends are AMAZING! We rode the struggle bus together and no one but us understand the pains of 12+ credit hours during the SUMMER semester!! I even spent my 21st birthday IN CLASS with them and they surprised me with this!

Then I have my TEC friends. I don't know where I would be without them. They are the reasons why I am where I am today. They are the ones that have encouraged me and held me up when I felt like I was falling down!

While I'm bummed that I wasn't "Friends Forever" with my high school friends, I have soooo many other AMAZ-BALLS friends! Ones that are supportive abd care about me! (But, I'm still looking forward to my 10 year class reunion in a couple of years, wonder what people will think about me...)